Isn’t it funny how we look differently at things that are about to change? Things that have annoyed me for the last couple of years now only earn a shrug. When the door handle in older one’s room fell off again the other day, I just slammed it back on and told it “I won’t miss you when we move.” Same goes for the dripping tap in the kitchen. (It does not drip all the time, or we would have fixed it long ago. I can go weeks or months behaving properly, but from time to time it seems to need some leaky days.)
I am sure the new house will have its little snags too (after all, nothing is perfect), and we will discover them bit by bit, but for now everything is shining with promise. Promise of a new beginning.
I also look at our stuff differently. “Where will I put you in the new house?” is a question many items have to answer. And if the answer is not satisfactory, their chance to make it into one of the moving boxes are not so good.
It feels good to let go of things I have not used/worn for years now. Things that are just sitting there in the cupboard or hanging in the wardrobe. They did not disturb anyone, so no one disturbs them. I tended to not even see them anymore, they just blended in with the background. But now everything is taken out and down, being evaluated, there are not fixed places anymore. And now guaranteed space in the new house.
There are of course things that do not need to go through my inquisition. Some things are sacrosanct, like the boys dearest toys, the stuffed animals in their beds (although the ones hiding in some boxes have been getting some pretty inquiring looks from me lately).
It feels good to have fresh eyes, be it only for some time. I know the alertness will wear off. As soon as the last box in the new house has been emptied, the last pieces have found their place, the routine will slowly come creeping back. When I will begin to know the place, will stop having to look for things, when I will open the right drawer in the kitchen automatically, my gaze will start to slide over things again, will stop noticing things. It is a feeling of increased ease, probably of really feeling at home, but it also takes away the sharpness, the awareness.
So maybe it is a good thing that it will probably take us ages to unpack those boxes. Maybe it will keep the gaze fresh a little longer. To keep on questioning the daily routine, to keep on really looking at my life.