Happy Birthday, Blog!

One year ago – after having thought about it for quite a while – I decided to give blogging a try. In the beginning I felt rather shy about it. It took me ages to pick a theme and think of a name for my blog. I tinkered around a lot – not because I am such a perfectionist, but because I did not want to put anything online that looked ridiculous.

I have already mentioned why I started the blog: to give some thoughts a home. And that worked out well. My intitial goal was to post something once a week – no really strict goal, just an idea, a number in my head to prevent me from getting too lazy. After one year this now my 40th post – not a big number, but ok. Especially if you take into account my stupid eye trouble, which reduced my screen time quite a bit.

What took me by surprise was how much I enjoy reading other people’s blogs. I do not follow a lot of blogs regularily, but there are a few I really try to keep up with. It sort of clicked when I read the first posts (with others there was no click at all.) To feel touched by the lives of people you have no other connection with than via their blogs, is special. When I read about their lives, their worries and moments of happiness, I feel worried or happy too. I do care.

So, a big thank you to all of them who share their lives, who have shown me new facets of being. Some of their lives are completely different than the ones I am living, some share some lines. But all of them give me food for thought, a different perspective and sometimes a good laugh.

 

Writing a bit, reading a lot, thinking even more. All in all, this has been a good blog year.

Happy birthday, blog. I will keep coming here.

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Project “Smile”

We all know that friendliness can get us a long way, but it is one of these self-evident concepts that are easily forgotten in the daily routine.

But a few days ago I came across an online article about “smiling at strangers”. I would quote it here, but I seem to have lost it, cannot find it back. Anyway, the message was simple: It is amazing how positive people respond to kindness from complete strangers, even it is just a smile. The author states he has made a habit of smiling at all people he comes accross on the street. (Probably not when stuck in a crowdy street, though.)

I think that is a nice idea, although I am sure I won’t manage to smile at really everyone. Not that the people I see in our streets are that hidous, but smiling at complete strangers does feel a bit odd, at least for me. I mean, I very often smile at small children on the street, or at their mothers when the kids are either behaving irrestiably cute or being a real challenge (in the last case the smile is meant as a boost for the mums nerves). I smile and make ‘thank you’ gestures at cars that let me cross a street (or rather at the people sitting in the cars). But smiling at someone just in passing? Not so often. So I tried it when walking back from the shops today. I did not really manage to smile at the middle aged man with the umbrella (he did look so serious – but ouch! I guess I am middle-aged too!). I did look at him in a friendly way though. The next person I came across was an elderly lady with a walking aid and a red wolly hat. This was more easy, I smiled at her, not only with my mouth but with my eyes too. She looked a bit surprised and gave me a tiny, but happy smile back.

So this is my new project then. Trying to smile more at strangers. Being really friendly to people I am interacting with – people I do not know, but who serve me my coffee at the restaurant, who hand me my bread at the bakery, these kinds of things. Which does not mean I have been unfriendly towards them so far. But I think we sometimes wear a frown without even noticing, being deep in thoughts or just living in our own world. I will try to show a happy face to the world – honestly happy, not faking.

(Which means there will be days when I cannot manage because I do feel grumpy or sick with a heavy cold or suchlike. But I will try.)

And when I am already at it, I will try to keep the impatience out of my voice when my boys are in the “we are so busy we cannot be possibly listening to any requests from mum at the moment”-mode. But that is another story.

Have a nice day full of smiles!

Posts that never make it

Most of my posts first get written into a small black notebook. A paper one. I scribble while I am waiting for the boys to finish their tennis or swimming lesson. I scribble when waiting at the doctor’s. I try to carry the black notebook with me whenever there might be a chance of some spare time. Pens are living in my bag anyway. At the end of the day, when Husband is away doing sports or we both feel like having a computer evening, I sit down and type it into the other notebook – the silvery electronic one. While doing that a lot of the sentences get re-phrases (made better, I hope), but the core of the thing stays the same. When finished, the draft in the notebook gets a tick. Done with it.

But some of them never get the tick. Some of them never make it online, they stay put in the little black book. Funnily enough, it still feels good to have them written down.

That was the original purpose of starting a blog: finding a home for some of the random thoughts that wander through my mind. Bundling them, putting them somewhere, so that they can stop turning up in my head again and again. Filed somewhere, so to say. I had written down stuff before, loose threads, but it never gave me the feeling of giving them a home. This blog is now their home, if they get read, that is fine, if not, well, so be it then. I am not kidding myself that the world has been waiting for my strange (or boring) ideas. There is a lot of everything already out there. But in my tiny corner of the web all of these thoughts can hop around, and somehow it feels good to give them a home there.

But back to the ones that stay in the book. Sometimes I write something – something that occupies my mind a lot at that moment – and I do not find the time to put it here. And then a couple of days pass, and I would have the time, but I think, hmmm. Should I really put this online? Somehow the need is gone. Maybe there are types of thoughts that prefer to be stuck in the little black book. They seem to be happy there.

(By the way, sometimes I also just sit down at the computer and start writing from scratch.)

(But yes, this post also originally was written down in the small book. Although I changed it around a lot. Sometimes it is easier to re-write it then trying to decipher my own handwriting.)

What was the point of all this?

No idea. Does everything have to have a point, always? (The answer might be yes, but I am not so sure.)

Maybe it is just something that wanted to be written down. In any case the process of writing made me kind of happy, which already would be some sort of point, right?

Good night.